By Stacy Dymalski
Apr 12, 2010
When it comes to technology I’m an immigrant, whereas my children are natives. In the time it takes me to change the TV channel, my teenage son can program our TiVo like he invented it. Between xBox Live, satellite TV, DVRs, YouTube, iTunes, 3G phones, the Internet, and other technology that escapes me at the moment, our children have access to more information than our parents experienced in their lifetimes. Pretty nifty, right?
Or is it? Cyberspace is a free-for-all. That means if it’s easy for your child to access information about any topic in the world, then it’s just as easy for anyone else in the world to access information about your child. Now, you may think, There’s nothing on the Internet about my kid, but keep in mind that even the simplest events (like junior appearing in a newspaper, or winning a science fair, or making the honor roll) can cause him or her to come up on an Internet search.
To find out if your child is cruisin’ on the super cyber highway, simply do a Google or Yahoo search on his or her name. Don’t panic if you instantly see a lot of hits, because undoubtedly you, your spouse, and other family members will come up, along with anyone else who shares your first or last name.
But even if no information about your kid comes up, that doesn’t mean someone can’t get it. If your child inadvertently gets on a weird website, or responds to a stranger’s email, or partakes in a chat room, they could mistakenly give out personal information to the wrong people. This is why it’s so important to put Internet restrictions on your children, starting as young as first grade.
One of the most popular filtering software packages for kids is Net Nanny (www.netnanny.com). According to their website "One in five children aged 10 to 17 have received a sexual solicitation over the Internet." Net Nanny not only blocks porn emails and websites, but also allows parents to control which websites their kids can access. And if you want to keep an eye on who your kid is “hanging out with” on the Internet, Net Nanny also provides social networking profile reports and instant messaging alerts. This means the software automatically informs you of who your kids are “becoming friends with” on popular sites like Facebook and MySpace, as well as monitors (and analyzes) instant messages that come from common messaging programs.
Other popular parent web-filtering programs include PC Tattletale, Sentry Parental Controls, Crayon Crawler, and GuardChild. They all block porn, however, beyond that they provide various levels of protection. It helps to do a web search on “Internet filtering software” and then do your research from there.
It also helps to talk to your kids about Internet safety. Check out www.protectkids.com to learn about potential web dangers, as well as how to communicate these dangers to your kids. They also explain how to create your own criteria for protecting your children online, so that you can pick the web-filtering software that’s right for your family. Also go to www.safeteens.com/kids-pledge, where you can download a Kids’ Pledge contract that you and your kids should both read and sign. It states 10 rules kids must live by when using the Internet, including I will never send a person a picture or anything else without checking with my parents first, or I will tell my parents if anyone I don’t know contacts me. The Safe Teens website is primarily for teenagers, however this contract is appropriate for kids in elementary school, as well.
Yes, the worldwide web is an amazing tool. Within seconds, my son can find the Latin root of any English word, or locate the nearest free WiFi connection. But with progress come opportunists, cyber carpetbaggers if you will, who do not necessarily care if they earn a dollar at our children’s expense. The first line of defense between kids and cyberspace are the parents. Why should the Internet be different from any other potential threat to our kids?
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Stacy Dymalski is a freelance writer, filmmaker, and stand-up comic. Her screen credits include co-writer (with Zack Van Eyck)/director of the feature film "Jupiter Landing" and writer/director of the web sitcom series "Hagnet." Stacy learned about being a parent the hard way: she became one. A working mom, Stacy finds the humorous lessons in family life and then writes about them in magazines and books (much to the annoyance of her two sons). Stacy recently co-authored 'The Vixen Chronicles' with Brandy Pinkerman:
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The Vixen Chronicles follows one woman’s backward search for Mr. Right
Brandy Pinkerman’s serial dating begins AFTER she marries a potato farmer at 18 just to get away from her controlling, abusive parents. Soon disillusioned by a husband who prefers business calls to blowjobs, Brandy eventually finds solace in the beds of other men, all of whom turn out to be just as dysfunctional as the family she left behind in small town Nebraska. Proving you can’t get rid of your demons until you bitch-slap them square in the face, Brandy ironically gains wisdom and self-esteem only after keeping company with some of the most narcissistic and morally-deficient men ever to walk the planet.
Brutally honest, painfully funny, and based on true events, Brandy Pinkerman will have you laughing through tears as she shares some of her most ill-advised dating adventures. We’ve all been there, but Brandy shows you that not only will you survive, but somewhere along the way you’ll realize that choosing the tougher road gives you answers to questions you never knew you had.
Brandy Pinkerman Janke is the owner of Tri-State Insurance and an associate at Renaissance Financial Services. She lives in Lubbock, TX, with her daughters, Hailey and Sydney. Currently, she's working on her second book "Adventures in Brandyland." And yes, she is still dating.
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